he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
