Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
