theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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