where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
