If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
