FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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