sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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