There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize