ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
