I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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