Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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