He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
