oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
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