K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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