NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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