Apparently you make a good broom.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
