haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
