this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
