Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
