So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
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