He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
So gin and wine won't be happening again
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
