I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
