Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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