No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize