I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
