I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
