Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Randomize
