hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
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