Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
