i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
so much tequila, so little girl.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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