i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Randomize
