No stitches, just platelets and will power
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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