I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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