it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
