Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize
