Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
