My hand turned me down
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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