..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
i believe in u and ur pee
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
