i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
