Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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