my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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