Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Four minutes until I can fart!
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
