If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize