why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Randomize