If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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