at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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