its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
soo... how was my night?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
