idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
