Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Randomize
