it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
